Physicians of the Utmost Fame
Were called at once; but when they came
They answered, as they took their Fees,
There is no cure for this disease.
Crime isn't a disease, it's a symptom. Cops are like a doctor that gives you aspirin for a brain tumour.
Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you, too.
God heals and the doctor takes the fees.
A cousin of mine who was a casualty surgeon in Manhattan tells me that he and his colleagues had a one-word nickname for bikers: Donors.
Accountants are the witch-doctors of the modern world and willing to turn their hands to any kind of magic.
For extreme illnesses, extreme treatments are most fitting.
Life is short, [the] art long, opportunity fleeting, experience deceptive, judgment difficult.
Nearly all men die of their medicines, and not of their illnesses.
No man, not even a doctor, ever gives any other definition of what a nurse should be than this -devoted and obedient.This definition would do just as well for a porter. It might even do for a horse. It would not do for a policeman.
There's no point in giving up something you enjoy unless you get something back that's even better, and quickly.
Physicians acquire their knowledge from our dangers, making experiments at the cost of our lives.
Cured yesterday of my disease. I died last night of the physician.
I can't stand whispering. Every time a doctor whispers in the hospital, next day there's a funeral.
He had had much experience of physicians, and saidthe only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not.
The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.
I only care to see doctors when I am in perfect health; then they comfort one, but when one is ill they are most depressing.
If I were a medical man, I should prescribe a holiday to any patient who considered his work important.
I had parents who believed I could do anything - and I know how that made me feel. I think both my parents, having careers in the medical profession, feel they are helping people on a daily basis, and that was inculcated in me as a value. I had to struggle with giving up the idea of becoming a doctor myself.
The physician can bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.